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This morning I came across an article titled “How to Stop Feeling Like a Fraud” by Lydia Dishman. In it, she talks about how even some of the most successful people, Meryl Streep and Denzel Washington, for example, think they are not worthy of the success they’ve achieved. Though they have reached the height of their careers, at times, they still feel like a fraud.
Heck, I feel that way, too, at times, and I’m pretty sure you have those moments yourself. I realize that sometimes these feelings come from insecurity or lack of confidence in your abilities. Other times, you feel like a fraud because you’re not being your authentic self. Instead, you’re wearing a mask. You’re being the person you think you have to be in order to be successful. I know how easy it is to get caught up in that, and it usually starts off pretty innocently.
It can start with investing in your personal development. That means studying other business owners, reading books and staying knowledgeable about what’s going on in your industry. The goal is to take what you learn and apply it to your own business, but that’s not always what happens. Instead, you pick a few of your favorite business leaders and copy what they do. Are they leading weekly webinars? Then you start leading them, whether you have the time or not. Are they writing a blog post a day? You start writing a blog post a day, even if nobody is reading. Are they doing speaking engagements across the country every weekend? You start booking yourself everywhere that needs a speaker, even though you miss your kids and really don’t like to travel. Well, it worked for them…
This is not the way to success and often leads to disappointment. You are to be the best YOU for your customers, not the best carbon copy of someone else. If you think you’re guilty of imitating someone else instead of operating authentically in your business, here are a few ways to get back on track.
1. Remember how far you’ve already come by being yourself. Chances are, you’ve already overcome some hurdles in life and in your business. You may even have some happy customers out there. If so, when you’re scared to raise your prices because you think no one will pay for what you’re selling, read over a past client testimonial. See how much of an impact you had on that client and know you do the same for many others. If that doesn’t work, call up one of your cheerleaders. Sometimes you need to see yourself through someone else’s positive eyes. Call that one person who you just know will tell you, “You know you are the best business person I know. You can do it!”
2. Use your own vocabulary. This probably sounds silly, but I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard my small business friends use buzzwords in their marketing materials that they would never use in real life. If you don’t normally use terms like awesome sauce, yummy, wowzers, delicious, etc., then leave them out of your business. It may read well, but you won’t feel genuine doing it.
3. Give yourself permission to stop and change directions. This can be the hardest part, especially if you’ve built part of your business around following someone else’s methods. Remember, if this is not leaving you fulfilled, it’s okay to stop. If you know that you should be doing something different, it is okay to change direction and get back on the right path. Take inventory of what makes you happy, check in with your current or potential clients to learn what they’d love to see more of from you and promise yourself to be authentic at all times.
